Relationship Challenges after the Holidays
The holiday season is the most challenging time of year for relationships. We have the highest rate of marriages breaking up after the holidays, and it seems to be a time of stress for most families.
The number of couples that are coming to see me for help after the holidays is greater than during the rest of the year. Luckily, these are couples who put energy into make their relationship work. They
notice when something is just not working, and they look for help.
The main reasons we usually give for this sad state of affairs are
€ lack of expression of feelings
€ being unable to reach compromises that take into consideration what is best for the relationship, instead of wanting to be €right' and make the other €wrong'
€ lack of gratefulness for who they are and what they already have
€ lack of connection in lovemaking
A lot of time is spent quarreling over what presents to buy for family members and friends and running around to find the appropriate present for all these people and for each other.
Not enough time is spent nurturing each other, and finding out what needs and feelings are not expressed during the very challenging holiday season.
With so much running around and planning going on at this time of year, not enough time is spent making love, and what sexual connections are being made may be automatic or rushed. Most of the
couples who have problems with relationships are using sex to release tension instead of nurturing each other and €making love' grow.
Tantra suggests that we pay more attention to fulfilling our inner needs once the survival outer needs are taken care of.
More time could be spent holding hands and talking about what's important, looking into each other eyes and noticing if there is sadness, and assisting each other to reach a joyful state of connection and pleasure.
Remember that buying presents might be pleasurable at times, but if it becomes a burden, just something we need to do to fit in and be part of the mass that follows the dictates of our consumer's society, then it is counterproductive. Learn to recognize when this is happening.
Tantra teaches us to be free to choose when we want to give outer presents to our loved ones. Tantra also encourages us to give each other the €inner presents' of love with demonstration of affection as
often as we can.
Spending quality time in love together helps:
€ keep our immune system healthy
€ maintain endorphins running through our system
€ elevate our mood
€ heighten our desire to take care of ourselves and our loved ones.
The work I do as a Tantric Healer helps people see and feel this and appreciate the importance of inner happiness.
As we move past the holidays, and into a new year of possibility, I urge you to consider that Christmas is any moment when you give birth to a more expanded you.
The number of couples that are coming to see me for help after the holidays is greater than during the rest of the year. Luckily, these are couples who put energy into make their relationship work. They
notice when something is just not working, and they look for help.
The main reasons we usually give for this sad state of affairs are
€ lack of expression of feelings
€ being unable to reach compromises that take into consideration what is best for the relationship, instead of wanting to be €right' and make the other €wrong'
€ lack of gratefulness for who they are and what they already have
€ lack of connection in lovemaking
A lot of time is spent quarreling over what presents to buy for family members and friends and running around to find the appropriate present for all these people and for each other.
Not enough time is spent nurturing each other, and finding out what needs and feelings are not expressed during the very challenging holiday season.
With so much running around and planning going on at this time of year, not enough time is spent making love, and what sexual connections are being made may be automatic or rushed. Most of the
couples who have problems with relationships are using sex to release tension instead of nurturing each other and €making love' grow.
Tantra suggests that we pay more attention to fulfilling our inner needs once the survival outer needs are taken care of.
More time could be spent holding hands and talking about what's important, looking into each other eyes and noticing if there is sadness, and assisting each other to reach a joyful state of connection and pleasure.
Remember that buying presents might be pleasurable at times, but if it becomes a burden, just something we need to do to fit in and be part of the mass that follows the dictates of our consumer's society, then it is counterproductive. Learn to recognize when this is happening.
Tantra teaches us to be free to choose when we want to give outer presents to our loved ones. Tantra also encourages us to give each other the €inner presents' of love with demonstration of affection as
often as we can.
Spending quality time in love together helps:
€ keep our immune system healthy
€ maintain endorphins running through our system
€ elevate our mood
€ heighten our desire to take care of ourselves and our loved ones.
The work I do as a Tantric Healer helps people see and feel this and appreciate the importance of inner happiness.
As we move past the holidays, and into a new year of possibility, I urge you to consider that Christmas is any moment when you give birth to a more expanded you.
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