There is no doubt that experiencing a divorce is a major life event.
So many women are deeply wounded and disempowered by going through this transition.
It is reasonable to grieve the loss of the dream of a life together that called you into your marriage.
Do not misunderstand my message: the grief, loss and anger you may be feeling are real, normal, and must be honored.
Take a period of time to simply absorb this big change.
Handle the details of negotiating the divorce agreement.
Re-establish a comfortable and secure place to live.
Adjust to custody arrangements with your children and your ex-husband.
All this work is essential.
Once this initial adjustment period is complete you have some personal choices to make.
All of these choices center around one fundamental question: what meaning are you going to make of this life experience? It is common for women (and men too) to make very disempowered meaning from a divorce.
Feelings of failure are common.
Feeling unlovable, unworthy, unwanted are also common.
When a third party is involved, the partner who is left alone often feels not good enough.
When these conclusions are drawn, divorce is a very unproductive experience.
It is possible, though, for someone to make empowered meaning from a divorce.
It can be considered a fresh start, a chance to find new love, a chance to learn from mistakes made and create a more fulfilling life alone, or with a new partner.
When divorce shows up as a chance for a new beginning life can step in to offer lots of exciting possibilities.
Connecting more deeply to one's intuition, and taking action on inner guidance can lead to the actualization of one's potential.
It is an opportunity to explore new avenues of creative self-expression, new hobbies, new friendships, and deepening current friendships that may have been neglected during your marriage.
Parts of yourself that had been shut away for the sake of the relationship can be dusted off and activated.
Did you always love dancing, but you married someone who didn't dance? Now is your chance to take dance lessons, find a new dance partner, and fully enjoy this creative movement.
Take some time to tune into your heartfelt desires.
What are you being called to do? The desires of your heart are there to guide you into the life of your dreams.
It takes courage to make new choices, explore new parts of your being, and take some risks.
But this is what is necessary to make passionate love to life! Let your passions be your guide and find your way into the life you were born to live.