Dealing With Child"s Tantrums
For a parent, there is nothing more perplexing than a child throwing a temper tantrum in public. While doctors claim that tantrums are normal especially for very young children since this is their way of communicating what they need or want, it is still embarrassing for parents to deal with a child monstrosity under judgmental scrutiny of other people.
A parent must be very careful in dealing with this behavior, since the effects of any reaction may have some long-term effect to your child's attitude, and contribute to how he'll handle things when he becomes an adult. So what should a parent do when faced with an episode of €when good children become wild?€
The cardinal rule is: Be firm and calm. Especially during tantrums, the child must realize who has the authority.
Parents should never punish the child having a tantrum. Spanking or slapping or yelling at the child while he is having a fit may relieve your anger, but not his. It may even aggravate his tantrum. You must remember that he does not act this way to ultimately make you mad, so fighting fire with fire is not the answer.
On the other hand, you must not reward the fuming child by giving in to his demands. Experts say this method of quieting the child down is a big mistake as it will lead the child to think he get away with it every time. He will eventually use it to manipulate his parent, which may continue even during adulthood.
Your best bet is to isolate the child from the public, and take him where you can have privacy. Once there, you can let the child express his anger or frustration without reacting to it. Wait for him to cool down. Once the child becomes calm, talk to him about it while the memory of his tantrum is still fresh.
Focus on the reason of his tantrum. Describe his behavior, so the child may know what he just did. Explain that throwing a tantrum is not appropriate. Be sure you make it clear that his actions were bad, and not him.
To prevent similar nightmarish episodes in the future, teach your child alternatives to vent out his feelings. Let him know he can always tell you what he wants without having to shout it out for other people to hear. Explain to him also that he may not always get what he wants, so he'll understand where you're coming from.
A parent must be very careful in dealing with this behavior, since the effects of any reaction may have some long-term effect to your child's attitude, and contribute to how he'll handle things when he becomes an adult. So what should a parent do when faced with an episode of €when good children become wild?€
The cardinal rule is: Be firm and calm. Especially during tantrums, the child must realize who has the authority.
Parents should never punish the child having a tantrum. Spanking or slapping or yelling at the child while he is having a fit may relieve your anger, but not his. It may even aggravate his tantrum. You must remember that he does not act this way to ultimately make you mad, so fighting fire with fire is not the answer.
On the other hand, you must not reward the fuming child by giving in to his demands. Experts say this method of quieting the child down is a big mistake as it will lead the child to think he get away with it every time. He will eventually use it to manipulate his parent, which may continue even during adulthood.
Your best bet is to isolate the child from the public, and take him where you can have privacy. Once there, you can let the child express his anger or frustration without reacting to it. Wait for him to cool down. Once the child becomes calm, talk to him about it while the memory of his tantrum is still fresh.
Focus on the reason of his tantrum. Describe his behavior, so the child may know what he just did. Explain that throwing a tantrum is not appropriate. Be sure you make it clear that his actions were bad, and not him.
To prevent similar nightmarish episodes in the future, teach your child alternatives to vent out his feelings. Let him know he can always tell you what he wants without having to shout it out for other people to hear. Explain to him also that he may not always get what he wants, so he'll understand where you're coming from.
Source...