Most married couples start as friends but as time progresses, the pressures of married life create stress on the relationship and issues if not addressed can actually destroy the marriage.
In a way conflict is inevitable when two people are living together, but conflict can be dealt with and doesn't have to spell and end to the relationship.
It can be helpful if couple undergo some pre-marriage counselling before tying the know.
Unfortunately, what happens in a conflict is that both people try and push their point of view thinking that's they way to win, but it usually only ends up making the other person more defensive.
What is really needed is for both partners to learn to listen well.
This is hardest with someone like your spouse who you live with an know well as you're pretty sure you know what they're going to say.
But try listening intently to what they are saying, listen for details.
They will make the other person feel that you understand.
Show you understand their feelings by verbalizing them.
For example if your wife says "You're always watching the TV when I want to talk to you", instead of replying "That's nonsense, I always listen to what you've got to say" try something like "You're upset because you feel I don't pay attention to you".
That way you show you're relating to their emotions it will ease the tensions.
A marriage expert I know once said "Most people become more honest with themselves & with you if they are treated compassionately.
" So let your respect and compassion for your partner show through in the words you say to the.
This kind of listening is not easy to do, of course, but is essential if you want to have good communications with your spouse and save a marriage!