Why am I worried all the time? Why can't I just take it easy and stop being worried about what others are thinking or saying about me?  Why is it so difficult to talk to people, why am I blushing...
? Well, questions like these occur to most of us every now and then, but  for some of us they are really a burden, an obstacle when trying to achieve what we really want in life.
If you must talk in public and you feel that you just can't do it, you get overwhelming physical symptoms, or if you really are worried all the time, or can't stop thinking of what others may say or think, chances are you are one of us who suffer from anxiety or low self esteem.
There are many reasons for anxiety and not all anxiety amounts to an anxiety disorder.
But anxiety, whether classified as a disorder or just an occasional problem, can affect your life and the decisions you make much more than you realised! You probably choose to avoid situations that could lead to you being anxious.
You may even choose your career based on how you believe other people are seeing you.
So, you let your anxiety rule in your life.
You let anxiety, and actually very often, other people, make decisions for you.
So why are you anxious? Why do you let others have such an influence in your personal life? Well, there are too many reasons to cover them all in a short article like this, but let's just summarise some possible causes: Unfortunately anxiety can be part of your genetic make-up.
Upbringing may have caused some of us to become more prone to anxiety, low self esteem and low self confidence etc.
Negative experiences in the past may have left a mark and we tend to think negatively, be suspicious rather than confident when it comes to our abilities or the way we believe others view us.
Stressful life experiences, of course, add to anxiety and to low mood.
These tend to add to negative thinking thus leading to low self esteem and anxiety.
If you have experienced some sort of trauma that you believe may be contributing to your anxiety,  you may wish to seek out medical help or therapy to work through your issues.
Some medical conditions can also lead to an increased amount of anxiety.
An overactive thyroid, high blood pressure, or diabetes can cause symptoms that can contribute to anxiety attacks.
Low mood and even clinical depression are often consequences of problems mentioned above, and can contribute to anxiety.
Any serious illness, or indeed any stressful situation can cause you to become anxious.
This is a vicious circle, because anxiety then makes life even more stressful; low mood even lower etc.
So, it may look rather hopeless.
And yet there is a cure!  And even a simple one.
What you should realize first of all is that this vicious circle must be broken down from somewhere! That is your first step to take.
Be it that you hit your low mood first, or high blood pressure or other condition you may suffer from, or address your social situation (relationships),  drugs or alcohol usage...
everything affects everything, you are a sum of your parts; what happens to a part of you will have an effect on the whole.
So, just start from somewhere! If you find it difficult to decide where to focus to break the vicious circle, you could do worse than tackling your negative thoughts first! If you think it, you may realize that negative thoughts (usually about yourself) and a worry about what others say, or how they see you are present in almost every situation where you might get anxious, or panicky.
You may have thoughts like:  "I can't do this; I'm sure I will be a failure; I'm too old/young/fat/skinny...
etc, everyone is watching me"...
Negative thoughts definitely play a big role with your anxiety.
And yet they can be easily defeated! You can get rid of the tendency to judge yourself negatively.
The aim of this article is to show that you yourself  can actually do something about your symptoms of anxiety, and even get rid of the whole problem.
Granted, sometimes if the anxiety is really extreme a therapy may be the way forward; sometimes a bit of counseling is enough.
  But luckily most of the cases could be won with just a twist in the way we see ourselves, a bit of common sense...
to learn how to cut the  vicious circle, to stop seeing yourself in a negative way and to stop being worried about what others may be thinking.
But how to learn not to worry?