Women trying to win back a boyfriend often follow the same identical formula.
What's funny is that none of them realize they're doing the same things everyone else does.
More importantly, these women are doing exactly what each of their ex-boyfriend expects.
So what, you might say? So everything! You're letting your ex sit back comfortably.
By knowing exactly where he stands with you, he's in no big rush to take you back.
In fact, as long as your ex still thinks you're hanging around waiting for him, he's got free reign to do whatever it is he wants, whenever he wants.
And unfortunately for you, with whomever he wants.
If you want your ex back, you need to do the exact opposite of everything your mental and emotional signals are currently telling you.
Instead of loving him you need to ignore him.
Instead of fighting the break up, you need to agree with it.
Instead of writing those love notes or sending your ex those desperate emails, you need to throw your pen over your shoulder and shut down your computer.
Only be shaking your ex out of his comfortable little position can you really make him think about you.
Thinking about you leads to missing you, and this leads to him wanting you back.
Remember, every girl who manages to fix her break up has one thing in common: she made her ex want her back.
Until you can accomplish this, you and your boyfriend will never renew your relationship.
Everything you do during the course of getting back together must be geared toward this one goal.
Every word you say (or don't say), every action you take (or don't take).
By now you should be getting the impression that everything you've been doing (or planning to do) is backwards.
And hey, guess what? It is.
All of the attention-focusing behavior most women exhibit only results in their ex feeling more and more comfortable with the concept of the break up.
How can he want you back if you're showing him that you're miserable and depressed? How can your ex miss you if you're always around? Now imagine the opposite types of behavior: being confident and strong instead of weak and vulnerable.
Disappearing completely from your ex boyfriend's sight instead of always being at the other end of the phone or computer.
Do these things, and immediately your ex is paying attention to you again.
Suddenly you're showing him an opposite behavior than the one he expects, which makes him not-so-comfortable anymore.
One thing you've got to understand is that although he broke up with you, your ex still wants to know what you're doing.
He wants to see that you still fawn over him, which in turn makes him feel needed.
This happily feeds his ego while letting him feel like he could get you back at a moment's notice.
So why would he get back together with you right now? He already has what he wants: the freedom to do anything he chooses, and the safety net to go back and repair your relationship whenever he decides to change his mind.
Opposite behavior is all about removing that safety net.
Breaking up with you was one thing, but your ex seeing you move on with your life is quite another.
Until you've knocked your ex boyfriend out of that comfort zone, he never has to face what life will be like without you in it.
Making him deal with that vision is one of the first steps toward winning back your boyfriend.
Only by taking control of the entire scenario surrounding your breakup can you push on those emotional hot-buttons that will get your ex back.