It is important that marriage improves one's well being, not suffocate or rob the individuals of who they are and what they want to be.
If this is the issue, you can save the marriage if you both are in accord.
Some people believe that once they are married, their spouse is supposed to be controlled.
Their spouse becomes their personal property or possession and they become their dictator or overseer, their spouse's lives have been stripped just because of a piece of paper and a wedding ring by someone with a big head and a little heart.
No one likes living under a roof with mental anguish.
They are going to want out, just to free themselves of the bondage.
Marriage is not meant to make one feel like a slave, nor does it give you the authority to take away the dignity of your spouse just because you are married to them.
Marriage is an 'I am an equal participant' in the merger between two people.
Marriage is teamwork, and if an unequal relationship is the issue and your spouse wants a divorce because of it, you are going to have to change your ways so that they will want to live under the same roof as man and wife.
If you can come to terms and agree on this, treating your spouse with respect and as your equal, then your marriage can be saved by cleaning up your act of always trying to be 'the boss'.
Just remember, you may be the head of the household because you are the provider or main breadwinner, however that does not make you the ruler even though you might feel like the king of your castle.
Just remember, a king needs a queen and she needs to be treated as such.
A queen needs her king also.
That's how you save a marriage with this kind of issue, and if you both are in accord.
If money has become between you and your honey and now they want a divorce because of overwhelming debt and out of control spending habits, the issue could be that you are spending more than what your spouse is bringing in.
Being married to a successful provider does not give you rights to abuse their wallets, their bank accounts, or their credit cards just because 'you see and you want'.
Spending in a marriage, and when there is only one income coming in, should be agreed upon.
A certain amount should be discussed, settled on and established without you going haywire in order to keep peace in the family, and the finances under control and reasonable.
Turning into a shop-a-holic after marriage when you were once conservative with your spending habits, could make your spouse a very unhappy camper, and if they are unhappy and miserable, you could be headed for trouble.
In this case, you should think about following a budget plan to ease their mind, and to show them that you are willing to change.
If you agree and you both want to save the marriage and overcome this issue, you can.
You can make it work by not letting the dollar bill come between you.
A steady cash flow means a lot in a marriage, but it does not make the marriage.
Responsibility, commitment, dedication, and love from both parties are what help a marriage to stand firmly.
Having money just adds a nice coating to that foundation of financial security, and if you are out spending and wasting the security haphazardly without thought of your spouse and what they are trying to build, a nest egg for your future, then it could bring chaos.
Mounting chaos can lead to ex spouses, when they have had enough of whatever it is that is turning their lives upside down and inside out.
You do not want to be the friction in the marital problem.