Should You Be a Stay-at-Home Parent?
In our career-driven society, our jobs are often a defining feature of us. For this reason, being a stay-at-home parent carries an unfair stigma that implies that we are lazy and lacking in ambition. After all, one would think caring for a child is so easy. If it were that easy, though, why would daycare facilities charge the rates they do?
I've been a stay-at-home mom since my twin girls arrived a year and a half ago. Initially I considered three options: going back to work part time around my husband's schedule, working full time and putting my daughters in daycare, and not working at all until they start school.
Finally I came to the decision that if my husband can support us on his single income, I should pursue the business that I've always wanted to. Now I operate a freelance writing and editing business online.
How I Made the Decision to be a Stay-at-Home Parent
I probably wouldn't have thought twice about going back to work if I'd only had one baby. As it turns out, twins don't get any sort of discount at most of our local daycare facilities. I grappled with the thought of bringing home $300 per month after taxes and childcare costs versus bringing no money home but getting to see my children all day. I also considered all the times that one or both of them might get sick and the daycare would send them home - then I would miss out on work and possibly lose my job after taking too many days off.
Finally, I considered the commute I would make to and from work. Most jobs in my field are more than 45 minutes away; gas alone would automatically take a little over $100 off of that $300 each month.
When my husband and I decided for sure that I would be a stay-at-home mom, we made a few adjustments to our living situation. We live in a small house, with a mortgage that only took my husband's income into consideration. Most of the time we eat in. We don't have a landline. My husband's cell phone is a prepaid phone, and in the past year he used $75 in minutes, as opposed to signing up for a plan that requires a two-year commitment, fees, taxes, surcharges, tacked on to an already outrageous bill. Many cell phone plans require that much per month.
How can you stay at home with your children?
If your job allows the flexibility, consider a consulting position with them. You can also get a part-time job that works around your partner's schedule.
If possible, keep your skills sharp to maintain your marketability when you decide to return to work. Since I had my twins I've been a freelance editor and writer; I run my own business and website offering these services online. My goal for the future is to have the experience necessary to gain full-time, stable employment as a writer and editor once my kids start school.
My intention is to educate parents who feel that they don't have a choice in the matter. If the idea of being a stay-at-home parent seems out of reach for you and your family, I hope that some of my shared experience and tips can offer a different perspective.
I've been a stay-at-home mom since my twin girls arrived a year and a half ago. Initially I considered three options: going back to work part time around my husband's schedule, working full time and putting my daughters in daycare, and not working at all until they start school.
Finally I came to the decision that if my husband can support us on his single income, I should pursue the business that I've always wanted to. Now I operate a freelance writing and editing business online.
How I Made the Decision to be a Stay-at-Home Parent
I probably wouldn't have thought twice about going back to work if I'd only had one baby. As it turns out, twins don't get any sort of discount at most of our local daycare facilities. I grappled with the thought of bringing home $300 per month after taxes and childcare costs versus bringing no money home but getting to see my children all day. I also considered all the times that one or both of them might get sick and the daycare would send them home - then I would miss out on work and possibly lose my job after taking too many days off.
Finally, I considered the commute I would make to and from work. Most jobs in my field are more than 45 minutes away; gas alone would automatically take a little over $100 off of that $300 each month.
When my husband and I decided for sure that I would be a stay-at-home mom, we made a few adjustments to our living situation. We live in a small house, with a mortgage that only took my husband's income into consideration. Most of the time we eat in. We don't have a landline. My husband's cell phone is a prepaid phone, and in the past year he used $75 in minutes, as opposed to signing up for a plan that requires a two-year commitment, fees, taxes, surcharges, tacked on to an already outrageous bill. Many cell phone plans require that much per month.
How can you stay at home with your children?
If your job allows the flexibility, consider a consulting position with them. You can also get a part-time job that works around your partner's schedule.
If possible, keep your skills sharp to maintain your marketability when you decide to return to work. Since I had my twins I've been a freelance editor and writer; I run my own business and website offering these services online. My goal for the future is to have the experience necessary to gain full-time, stable employment as a writer and editor once my kids start school.
My intention is to educate parents who feel that they don't have a choice in the matter. If the idea of being a stay-at-home parent seems out of reach for you and your family, I hope that some of my shared experience and tips can offer a different perspective.
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