Child behavior can be a tricky thing. Parents can tell themselves that defiant or inappropriate behavior is just a phase that their child is going through, but often, it gets worse with time. What can you do about these problems? How can you restore a sense of peace and order to your home without going off the deep end or resorting to drastic measures?
Many parents are at their breaking point when it comes to their children. Behavior that was unacceptable and severely punished when we were kids, like being disrespectful to adults, seems to be a given with the kids of today. Although you may not like that your child treats you disrespectfully at times, you're probably more worried about how treating other adults outside the family in this way will affect the course of your child's life. Of course in the scheme of child behavior, being disrespectful occasionally isn't as bad as criminal behavior, illegal drug use, skipping school and the like. Since this is true, you can also see why even though disrespect can be common in children, behavior like this should be addressed immediately, so it doesn't worsen and lead to other unsavory behaviors.
If the behavior in your home has already gone way beyond disrespect and outright defiance, then you need to take action quickly. This is because this type of behavior is not just a phase that your child is going through and can become much worse as time goes on. Eventually, the authorities may have to get involved. That's how serious this can become. One way to address this child behavior is with punishment or withdrawal of privileges, but this backfires with some kids and makes them even more defiant. The trick is learning how to set the limits without being harsh or punitive.
Another course of action is to take your child to a therapist. Therapy can be effective for some kids. Other kids will simply refuse to go, while some will go to the session, cross their arms, stare at the therapist and say absolutely nothing. Sometimes, a good therapist can draw them out. Still, it's important to realize that there are no guarantees with therapy and insurance does not cover all the costs. There are kids who have been in therapy for years and are still acting out, so understand that it is a process.
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