How to Deal With Divorce
- 1). Assign a mourning period. Allow yourself a period to acknowledge and grieve the end of the marriage. With a therapist or support network exhaust the necessary emotional cycle of rage, sadness, anxiety and uncertainty until you find a stronger and more consistent sense of peace and emotional stability.
- 2). Find closure through meaningful conversation. Discover the qualities of the relationship that attributed to the success of the marriage during its primary years. When speaking about the divorce with your ex-spouse or extended family focus on the conversation on behaviors that allowed the marriage to work rather than focus on those that may have caused it to slowly dissolve.
- 3). Avoid casting blame onto your ex-spouse. Take responsibility for your actions, thoughts, resentments and behaviors. Acknowledging that you and your ex-spouse have both made mistakes. Take responsibility for the choices you have made in the past to consider how those choices may guide you in the future.
- 4). Agree to not carry emotional baggage. Agree that it is neither healthy nor reasonable to carry the weight of past errors into the future. Forgive your ex-spouse. Begin the process by agreeing to no longer assign the "bad guy" label to yourself or ex-spouse when discussing the marriage or divorce.
- 5). Move on. Know that together you and your spouse have contributed to the state of the marriage. Accept the finality of the decision. After a period of reflection, rejuvenation and rest, acknowledge that it is time to move on. Consider a new move, change in career or new wardrobe to mark the start of the next chapter in your life.
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