Trying to save a relationship can be both frustrating and heartbreaking, the more so if the relationship was with someone you love dearly.
And it's often made worse because none of us receive any instruction on how to go about it.
As a result, we're lacking in information and direction, flailing about and looking for help.
Perhaps you've already read about how you should keep in communication with your ex, apologise to them and suggest the two of you have a trial reconciliation.
So far so good, but how do you really rekindle the magic that launched your relationship in the first place? If you can just do that then you're more than half way there.
This is where MMFG-AM comes into play.
It sounds like a radio station and in a way it is - it's the station most of us, and especially your ex, are tuned into, and it stands for, "Make me feel good - about myself".
Whatever the immediate causes of your split, most probably your ex no longer feels good about themselves when they're with you.
Whatever the reason may be for this, your first job is to assure them that whatever happened to spoil the "feel good" factor will never occur again.
You probably won't be able to do this with mere words and promises.
And if you look at things from their point of view (an essential ability, by the way, if you're to win your ex back) you'll probably understand why.
You have to convince you ex of this by your actions and behaviour.
For example, if the main reason for your split was that you were regularly drinking too much and getting drunk, then no amount of promises to change your ways will help you if your ex is hearing back from mutual friends that you're still regularly getting drunk in bars every weekend.
That's not how to save a broken relationship.
Cast your mind back to the time when you were first going out together.
What was it that attracted your ex to you? Whatever it was specifically, the chances are that it made your ex feel good - about themselves.
It didn't necessarily make them think that you yourself were wonderful - but it did make them feel great about themselves when they were with you.
There's a subtle difference between the two things - one that's seldom appreciated by most people.
When they were attracted to you, it wasn't as a spectator - it was as a participator.
They wanted to join in the fun and the aurora of activity that surrounded you so as to share in it and be part of it - not just to admire you and whatever you were doing.
Do you think the women that surround famous sports stars do so just to show their appreciation of how brilliant those sports stars are? No - they do it because it makes them feel good.
It gives a special meaning to their lives.
Your mission now is to use this knowledge and apply it to your own situation, to the kind of person that your ex is.
You alone know what it was that first attracted them to you.
Work the same kind of magic so as to make your ex feel not just good, but elated, floating on air, when they're with you.
Share a magic experience with them, something that only happens very rarely.
It needn't cost a lot of money - it all depends on whether you are well off or strapped for cash.
So even if you don't have much money you can still do it.
A weekend trip to the mountains (if you're well off) or a fairground ride (if you don't have so much cash).
A visit to the opera (if they're an opera lover) or to the movies.
A day trip with all your mutual friends or an evening alone together at a country beauty spot.
It all depends on what they enjoy the most and what resources you have at your disposal.
Take this on board and you'll find that if your relationship really was worth saving, then save it you will.