Whenever we're first faced with something as challenging as saving our own marriage, it's important to know what you should and shouldn't do.
But, it's not like you were ever handed a checklist of such things when you first tied the knot.
What normally happens is, we find ourselves making horrible mistakes that can jeopardize our chances to save the marriage.
More often than not, the mistakes we make while trying to save it tend to cause more damage to the marriage than the original problem.
So, here are a few things you should avoid doing at all cost.
The first thing is to avoid smothering your spouse with questions about the marriage.
It's common and quite natural to want to get to the bottom of why your spouse has chosen to end the marriage.
But, when you're not getting the answers you want, or they don't quite add up, we tend to push harder.
Digging or nagging even further which in some instances borders on obsessing or harassing our spouse to an extent that our spouse would rather avoid any and all talks about the marriage.
This only leads to more trouble as civil communication between the both of you has reached a boiling point and often breaks down completely.
When this happens, any and all discussion about saving the marriage will be avoided as much as possible by your spouse.
They now have the urge to get away from it all, rather than deal with you.
So give your spouse some space, don't spoil your chances by being to over baring while you think of more clever ways to approach them.
One of the next important things to avoid doing is blaming your spouse for this or that during your marital crisis.
Your marriage has already reached a critical point where it hangs in the balance between divorce and working together to save it.
Bringing up past events that have wronged you or have wronged each other only adds further justification to your spouse for why the marriage should end.
You obviously love your spouse, and I assume they still love you deep down.
Let go of those events so that both of you can move forward without carrying a chip on your shoulder so to speak.
By letting go, you can level the field and begin building on fresh ground.
This is critically important when trying to save the marriage because it is only then that you can begin taking real steps towards fixing your marriage.
If either of you tries to hold on to any of the wrong that has been done while trying to move forward, then the marriage will continue to ride the fine line between love and hate.
Which is unhealthy for any marriage.