Being a mother is quite an adventure I dare say.
It's a challenge too.
No body on this earth has made me discover the emotions within me like my twin teenage daughters.
I have gone from feeling such tender and exquisite love to hostility.
I remember the discipline with which I was raised.
It wasn't overly strict but my dad did give me hidings when I refused to listen or give him back chat.
It didn't stop me from keeping my mouth shut, in fact it just made me angrier that kids were treated like inferiors, like they didn't know anything.
How often did I hear, "I'm a lot older than you and you have no experience.
" Two twin girls aged 13 going on to 25 is well, to say the least daunting at times.
I have to get into real self discipline so I don't succumb to their level to get my point over in an argument.
Oh my, whata reflection of myself when my kid, stands there with hand on hip lecturing me about which washing powder to use to get a stain out of her white blouse.
She says things like, "Mama you really should watch more TV so you can see what's going on in the world".
I never watch TV.
But I do watch myself and I do watch my girls and it's amazing how much of myself I recognise in them.
I always know what part of my thinking and personality needs fine tuning just by watching them.
That hand on hip thing, is from me.
That disapproving tone of voice also comes from me.
What is even more frightening is when I realise I am being like my mother! The other day I caught a glimpse of myself in the bath room mirror whilst nagging my kids to hang up their towels and clean up after a shower.
How many times have I made silent vows to myself to not nag? I remember what it was like having a nagging mother.
It did not help, not one bit.
In fact the more she nagged the more I didn't care about wet towels on the floor.
I remember exactly those moments when I was thirteen and my mom just seemed to be the perfect square.
I recall thinking to myself I will never be like that.
And what do you know? There is me in all my mother's glory.
I've noticed what works really well is to give compliments.
Even if your child is standing in front of you rolling eyeballs and looking totally bored say something like, "Hey I forgot how lovable you are when you do that.
" I mean remember when they did all those things when they were 2.
You thought it was cute then.
Now just because the child has grown and speaks for it self you think it's cheeky.
When my twin girls were born I couldn't wait for them to begin talking.
I was so excited to find out what was going through their heads.
I remember the first time they saw a naked man they named his private parts a swing bum! And they used to call me Mamela because my best friend's name was Pamela.
And the names for my parents were so apt.
They called my Dad - Big Papi and my mom - Baby Mami Papi.
I have no idea where they got that from, but it was very cute and heart wrenching.
Kids are so wonderful and uninhibited.
To experience more joy just give them more love even if you're itching to say something mean.
I know it's not so easy to adore them every moment of the day, especially when they come home from school with friends you don't really approve of.
The best way to deal with this is to love the friend and treat it like your own.
I treat all the kids that come here like my own.
I've seen everything from the good mannered to the absolute uncouth.
I know that even the uncouth got some of that from home and can't help it.
And some of them well you know, it's cool to be that way.
I'm always glad that my children feel so comfortable in their home that they have no qualms about introducing "square me" to the coolest of the coolest.
That way I'm always in the big picture.
I get to see who's who in the zoo, and that is priceless knowledge for any mother with teenage kids trying out their own way.