My guess is that bullies have existed as long as man has.
Victims have had to endure the pushing, name-calling, and gossiping for as long.
Why does it seem that no matter what programs are implemented in schools, bullying still exists and now to the point that children are killing themselves? How do we convince these bullies that bullying is wrong, and is that the answer? I don't know if bullies can be convinced that what they are doing is wrong.
I often heard high school bullies state that they bully because they can.
If that is why they bully, then it seems that is the answer.
We need to change the climate so that bullies can't get away with it.
Does this mean that laws need to be in place? Yes.
Do schools need rules with punishment handed out? Again, yes.
However, something else that can be done is to raise our children in such a way that they are resistant to the efforts of bullies.
For a period of time we were told that as educators it is partly our responsibility to instill self-esteem in our children.
That led to policies such as no-cuts in sports and no zeroes allowed in class.
We also saw children getting medals or trophies just for being on a team.
They didn't even have to show up half the time for games or practices.
If they were there on the day the awards were given out, they got one.
These efforts were to help children feel good and raise their self-esteem.
I realized when my children were out of college and cleaning out their rooms that it really didn't work.
How do I know? The only trophies or medals they kept were the ones they actually earned.
They threw away the "Participation Medal" saying, "Everybody got one of those.
It really didn't mean anything.
" What then is the answer? We need to teach our children from the moment they are born that they are important, worthy human beings simply because they are here.
They need to know from early on that they have something to contribute and that they have gifts they need to share.
In turn, all children need to be taught that the same is true for everyone.
By teaching these lessons early on, we will be encouraging our children to have a better sense of self.
Through these lessons, we need to teach children about how to identify their feelings and how to manage them.
The importance of recognizing their own feelings is so important, but just as important is teaching them how to share those feelings with someone they trust.
Children need to know what they value and what is important to them and how to stand up against those people and things that go against what they believe in.
this takes a lot of talk with children from a very young age, but they need to be used to this in order to put those beliefs into practice when they are older.
Teaching children these lessons have a two-fold result.
First, our children are empowered with the belief and knowledge that they are important and worthwhile just the way they are.
With beliefs like this, they have the skill to stand up for themselves against bullying.
Remember, high school bullies told me they bully because they can.
The second result is that if we teach our children that they are important and that all people are important, they hopefully will not feel the need to bully.
If children feel good about themselves just the way they are, there is no need to make someone else feel less in order to feel good.
It is hard to treat others cruelly if you believe that everyone is important.
Eliminating bullying doesn't happen when children get to school.
It must start before then.
Our push needs to be how to parent our children from the beginning so they grow into kind and respectful people.