Seven Online Dating Email Writing Mistakes that Get Your Emails Deleted with No Reply!
As an avid online dater myself and a dating coach, I am always on the lookout for ways that I can improve my initial email communications with other online daters. There is an art to writing an initial email to a total stranger online and getting them to open it. In addition, it has always been very interesting to me to see what strategies or efforts work or do not work on me when I receive an email.
Today I would like to share the most common mistakes people make when sending an initial email on an online dating site and how to correct them.
So, here we go:
#1- Not Using the Email Subject Line to Your Advantage
One of the easiest ways to get more opens on the online dating emails that you send to someone is to strategically use the email subject line. Many people do not do this and either leave it blank or write a boring "Hi."
If you are emailing someone who gets quite a few emails, you will need to entice them to open yours. You can find something that you are planning to talk about in your email and reference it in your subject line, come up with something cute or clever or create an air of mystery by writing part of a sentence and continuing it in the body of the email to get the receiver to open the email to read the rest of it.
#2- Writing a Generic Email That Could Be Sent to Anyone
Resist the urge to write generic form letters that you send out to everyone on the online dating site or emails that are boring like "Hi, how is your day"?
Although you may get some responses from these emails, you will do much better to take a few minutes to read the persons dating ad and to find something in the copy or the photos to comment on or talk about. This lets the person who receives your dating email know that you took the time to read about them and to create an original email.
#3- Sending Your Phone Number Out in Your First Email
Sending your phone number out and telling someone to call you without having any previous communication with them is a no-no. It may work for you on occasion, but from the receivers' point of view may be a big turn-off.
You may come across as desperate or too aggressive and it is risky for you to give your phone number to someone who you have not communicated with at all. They may not be the kind of person that you would want to have your number; however you would not know that because you did not take the time to communicate with them via email first to get a feel for them.
#4- Writing a Book Instead of a Concise Email
Resist the urge to show your enthusiasm for someone by writing a lengthy initial email that gives out too much information about you or goes on forever. Instead keep your online dating email fairly short and concise. Somewhere in the neighborhood of three-to-eight sentences should be enough for you to communicate effectively.
Avoid giving too much info about yourself, discussing deal-breakers, and as mentioned before writing a long introductory email. Giving too much information too soon can help the reader eliminate you before they have ever considered you and everyone is pressed for time, so when in doubt, keep your email on the shorter side.
#5- Sending Emails that Exclusively "Brown Nose"
When you send an email, you will want to avoid sending a barrage of empty compliments to the other person such as telling them how hot their body is, how good looking they are and a load of other generic compliments. If you want to compliment them, do so on a specific item found in their profile and do not overdo it. Be sincere.
#6- Sending Emails Without Checking for Typos
It only take a few moments to review your email before you push send to make sure that you have not made any spelling or grammatical errors. Even though you may be smart as a whip, when you sent out emails with numerous typos in them, you lose credibility.
If your online dating email program does not have a spellchecker you could still check the spelling of any suspect words by using an online dictionary or by cutting and pasting your copy into a program that does have a spellchecker.
#7-Not Giving the Reader a Reason to Answer You Back
If you write emails that do not give the reader a reason to contact you back, or that do not contain a call to action (telling them what to do), you will get less responses from the readers.
Be sure to ask at least one polite question about something a picture you have seen or what you have read in the persons profile that they can quickly answer or elaborate on. As you are wrapping up the email, be sure to tell them that you would enjoying hearing back from them in a confident, polite tone.
By avoiding the simple mistakes listed, you are bound to write better initial emails to get more people to open them and if interested in you-respond back. As you have heard before-you never get a second chance to make a great first impression. If you need help, consider getting an email consultation with an online dating coach.
Best of luck in your online dating endeavors!
Today I would like to share the most common mistakes people make when sending an initial email on an online dating site and how to correct them.
So, here we go:
#1- Not Using the Email Subject Line to Your Advantage
One of the easiest ways to get more opens on the online dating emails that you send to someone is to strategically use the email subject line. Many people do not do this and either leave it blank or write a boring "Hi."
If you are emailing someone who gets quite a few emails, you will need to entice them to open yours. You can find something that you are planning to talk about in your email and reference it in your subject line, come up with something cute or clever or create an air of mystery by writing part of a sentence and continuing it in the body of the email to get the receiver to open the email to read the rest of it.
#2- Writing a Generic Email That Could Be Sent to Anyone
Resist the urge to write generic form letters that you send out to everyone on the online dating site or emails that are boring like "Hi, how is your day"?
Although you may get some responses from these emails, you will do much better to take a few minutes to read the persons dating ad and to find something in the copy or the photos to comment on or talk about. This lets the person who receives your dating email know that you took the time to read about them and to create an original email.
#3- Sending Your Phone Number Out in Your First Email
Sending your phone number out and telling someone to call you without having any previous communication with them is a no-no. It may work for you on occasion, but from the receivers' point of view may be a big turn-off.
You may come across as desperate or too aggressive and it is risky for you to give your phone number to someone who you have not communicated with at all. They may not be the kind of person that you would want to have your number; however you would not know that because you did not take the time to communicate with them via email first to get a feel for them.
#4- Writing a Book Instead of a Concise Email
Resist the urge to show your enthusiasm for someone by writing a lengthy initial email that gives out too much information about you or goes on forever. Instead keep your online dating email fairly short and concise. Somewhere in the neighborhood of three-to-eight sentences should be enough for you to communicate effectively.
Avoid giving too much info about yourself, discussing deal-breakers, and as mentioned before writing a long introductory email. Giving too much information too soon can help the reader eliminate you before they have ever considered you and everyone is pressed for time, so when in doubt, keep your email on the shorter side.
#5- Sending Emails that Exclusively "Brown Nose"
When you send an email, you will want to avoid sending a barrage of empty compliments to the other person such as telling them how hot their body is, how good looking they are and a load of other generic compliments. If you want to compliment them, do so on a specific item found in their profile and do not overdo it. Be sincere.
#6- Sending Emails Without Checking for Typos
It only take a few moments to review your email before you push send to make sure that you have not made any spelling or grammatical errors. Even though you may be smart as a whip, when you sent out emails with numerous typos in them, you lose credibility.
If your online dating email program does not have a spellchecker you could still check the spelling of any suspect words by using an online dictionary or by cutting and pasting your copy into a program that does have a spellchecker.
#7-Not Giving the Reader a Reason to Answer You Back
If you write emails that do not give the reader a reason to contact you back, or that do not contain a call to action (telling them what to do), you will get less responses from the readers.
Be sure to ask at least one polite question about something a picture you have seen or what you have read in the persons profile that they can quickly answer or elaborate on. As you are wrapping up the email, be sure to tell them that you would enjoying hearing back from them in a confident, polite tone.
By avoiding the simple mistakes listed, you are bound to write better initial emails to get more people to open them and if interested in you-respond back. As you have heard before-you never get a second chance to make a great first impression. If you need help, consider getting an email consultation with an online dating coach.
Best of luck in your online dating endeavors!
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