I have been with my current girlfriend for the last year. We've been best friends for three years. I have always been comfortable with my sexuality, and been pretty open about it. On the other hand, she's from an EXTREMELY religious family, and I am only her second girlfriend. (She's almost gotten married before, and regularly dated men.) We've been living together for the last six months, but I'm her "roommate". I want take our relationship to the next level, we've discussed it and agreed, but I can't be okay with it if I'm just going to be a little secret locked up in her closet. What do I do? I love her deeply, but don't know if I can go on much longer with out being able to even look at her with love without her getting upset at me. Please help, I need some advice.
Secret Lover

Dear Secret Lover

You?re in a tough spot. Being out and proud and having a partner in the closet isn?t easy. You have to remember, some of us burst right out of the closet once we realized we liked the smell of another woman?s body. Others, like your girlfriend, have a lot of baggage from their childhood that keeps them from being truly open about who they are.
Of course you understand there are a lot of reasons for this. Besides the messages we get from our families and our churches, it also takes us some time to truly accept ourselves as a lesbians. Our culture does not show us many examples of happy/healthy lesbian relationships. So, what can you do about your partner in the closet?