If you're thinking about getting back together again with your ex girlfriend, the situation has to be handled very carefully. Understand that a lot of feelings, both yours and hers were injured and that it will take a while for them to heal. Great care must be taken so that you can avoid triggering the arguments that caused you to break apart.

Here are some suggestions:

You should reflect on what the cause of the break up was and whether changes for the better are possible. Can you do anything to guarantee that further breakups will not occur in the future? Compromise will most likely be required. Will you be able to live with them? Will she accept them? An understanding of the reasons for the breakup will help you in avoiding accidentally starting up old conflicts when you approach her.

There are two requirements that are somewhat contradictory. On the one hand, it's very important that you maintain contact with her. On the other, you mustn't overdo your efforts because this will scare her away. In fact, communication with her should be scaled back but not cut off after a break up.

You will have to let her know in a subtle and casual way that you still want to be a part of her life. Your contacts with her must be relaxed, laid back, and not too often. Send the occasional "what's up?" email but don't fill up her inbox because it will give her the wrong impression.

Find harmless and positive ways that show that you are still thinking about her. Let her know that she's still important to you by remembering the dates in her life that are important. Send a card on her birthday and on holidays.

It's important not to allow yourself to be cut off from the world. Go out with your friends and keep an active social life. This allows you to remain upbeat. Your ex must never get the impression that you are falling apart over the break up.

You should be showing her that you're just fine but that you still care about her. This enables her to rethink the times that the two of you shared without feeling pressured.

Finally you should work to become friends with her again. This should recapture the good things that the both of you had and will create trust. With time, this trust will grow stronger and bring the two of you closer together.

There is no exact formula to winning back your girlfriend but these suggestions will steer you in the right direction. Maintaining the lines of communication is essential but it should be relaxed and subtle. Get too aggressive and you'll scare her away.