Were you shocked when you were first diagnosed with arthritis, even though you had been experiencing the symptoms and it runs in your family? It's only human nature to want to cling to the possibility that "it won't happen to me.
" After all, most of us don't go around assessing our chances of getting hit by a medical diagnosis.
The typical reaction to a diagnosis is total surprise, unbelief that you could have arthritis, even though it runs in your family.
You many ask the doctor to repeat the diagnosis several times, then there is denial, I know that I've had some pain but I thought it was from exercising.
Most times it's not the diagnosis as much as it is the thought of your life is never going to be the same.
If you are like most people who have been recently diagnosed with arthritis, you might be asking the question that comes to everyone's mind when they are diagnosed with a chronic illness, "Why me?" Or maybe you're asking yourself, "What will happen to me?" "What will my life be like?" "Will I ever be normal?" These are the big questions and there are no easy answers, if there are any answers at all for these questions.
It's normal to be full of questions.
Just don't let it stop you from seeking the answers and facing the diagnosis and all that it is going to mean for you from a position of power.
Develop a positive outlook and learn all you can about your arthritis, connecting with people in your life that can help you, but also find a greater sense of meaning beyond your day-to-day experiences, and having a plan for your future that is both realistic and optimistic.
How you can prepare for the road ahead.
You will want to stay centered, that is hanging on to who you are as a person and not as a patient.
It begins with looking inside you.
Start preparing for the future by admitting to the emotions you are experiencing right now.
It's OK to feel fear, anger, disappointment, and confusion when you learn you have arthritis.
But these feelings won't disappear just because you want them to.
As soon as you admit to your feelings, even those you feel you shouldn't be having, the effect is magnificent.
Those feelings loose power over you, but when negative feelings are accepted and felt, they will give way to hope, enthusiasm, and a renewed desire for life.
You might find that it is easier to bring out those feelings by talking with someone else.
Find a family member, a friend, a counselor, or a member of your church who can be a fair listener and help you to sort out just how you feel.
I sought out my husband to talk to not realizing that he was having a harder time with my diagnosis then me.
I really didn't have anyone else to turn to so I took on the task of dealing with my own feelings by journaling.
By writing down my feelings I was able to see the anger, anxiety, and confusion and relay it back to my doctor who referred me to a psychotherapist who helped me to deal with them by talking about them.
Have you asked yourself exactly what your diagnosis has changed? You were diagnosed with arthritis, and that diagnosis is going to bring about some challenges as you move through your life.
Arthritis is an extra test that is thrown into your pathway, but it doesn't mean your life is over, it doesn't mean your life will be centered on just the arthritis.
After my diagnosis, I was energized to find a way to beat the arthritis.
Then as time went on, and the arthritis got worse and I had more and more added on top of that diagnosis, I lost all hope that I would lead a normal life again.
I started to believe my life was over as I knew it, which lasted for nearly five years.
When you are very active in life and suddenly you are told that you will never be able to do the activities you once did, it's a shock and you really do feel that your life is over.
I have now come to terms with my conditions and do the activities I use to do, only now, I have to plan my activities, picking and choosing which ones will cause the least amount of pain and fatigue.
You must remind yourself that you are still basically yourself.
What you love about yourself and what others love about you, the gifts, the faults, and the quirks are still all there.
A diagnosis of arthritis doesn't take away who you are on the inside, it is affecting you physically and that's all.
The definition of who you are, and what is normal, might make you ask "Am I ever going to be normal again?" I guess the answer would have to be, don't accept that you are not normal; instead your normal is going to be different from what is considered "the norm.
" I've often asked the question "What is normal?" I think that normal is whatever you think it is for you.
Your "new normal" might include incorporating arthritis treatments into your life.
This will mean working very closely with your health care team in determining a strategy for dealing with the pain and conserving your strength through medicine, exercise, and other changes to your routine.
If your doctor hasn't talked to you about your diagnosis and given you some sort of treatment recommendations, please make an appointment to do so.
This is the time to ask all those questions that come up after you are told you have arthritis.
You want to find out as much as you can about your arthritis and the medications that are prescribed to you, so you can be active in your treatment.
Stay informed.
With the internet, you are able to research just about anything and if you are not Internet savvy then find someone to help you or hire an information broker to do the searches for you.
Either way, find out what you can about your diagnosis whether on the internet or from brochures you can get from the Arthritis Foundation.
You might even want to consider looking for a support group to network with and exchange information.
If you can't find a support group you might want to consider starting one yourself, it really isn't that hard.
Use the keywords "how to start arthritis support group" and it should bring up several "how to" sites.
It can be scary to read about your own medical condition, and if you happen upon something that raises concerns, don't think twice about asking your doctor about it.
The best way to get a grip on your fears is to find out all you can about your condition, you will end up drowning your fears with facts.
By partnering with your doctor you will be able to identify your resources and reach out to them.
As you become more educated about your condition you can discuss what you have learned and ask for feedback from your doctor.
When your doctor recommends a treatment don't be afraid to ask "Why?" You might want to make suggestions on how you think exercise and other activities might be beneficial, and ask about alternatives when your doctor recommends something that you may feel that you will not be able to do.
If you experience a different or a symptom that you are not expecting, contact your doctor.
More than likely he will have you come in so he can examine you.
The people around you will influence how you feel emotionally and how you feel about your diagnosis, but you will have an impact on their reactions as well.
A diagnosis of arthritis can be scary for your family too, especially if they don't have up-to-date information.
My husband on the other hand, refused to read anything about arthritis; as a matter of fact he wouldn't even admit that there was anything wrong with me.
He couldn't believe that there was nothing they could do for me to give me back my life as well as his.
You will want to let your loved ones know how they can support you in the best way possible.
They might start watching you, making sure that you are following the doctors' orders and treatment regiments to the letter.
This can become annoying even though they mean well.
When and if this happens, have a talk with them explaining that you appreciate their concerns but you don't need to be treated like a child.
Make an agreement with them that outlines what you will do to stay on track with what your doctor has prescribed, what you need from them and how you will help them to help you.
Communication is important in helping the people who care about you to better understand the things they do that make you feel as if you're not a person but a diagnosis.
With a diagnosis of arthritis you will feel that it's all about losing the ability to do all the things you have enjoyed in life and now can't do.
You will find that your conversations will be about what you have lost or what you will lose in the future.
Instead of focusing on what you have lost, you might want to focus on what you can gain.
There may be activities that you haven't tried before, but might be fun and realistic.
Talk to your doctor about new activities you can try and do some research online or ask other people with arthritis and what they are doing to stay active.
If you take your focus off your limitations, you can open up to many new possibilities.
To gain a new perspective, try connecting with something that is beyond your own experiences.
Whenever you feel connected to whatever you consider to be your Higher Power, you will expand beyond what you see and experience, your definition of yourself expands.
To experience spirituality you may begin to pray, practice meditation, read the works of spiritual teachers and start to apply their viewpoints to your life, or become a member of a religious community.
I started watching Joyce Meyers five years after my diagnosis and then after several years of watching her on television I started going to a new church close to my home.
It gave me a new purpose in my life and gave me life again.
During this time I also started listening to music for meditation that would calm me, and pursued my passion for needle crafts that relaxed me and kept me on an even keel.
Practicing compassion is another type of spirituality.
By helping someone else with love and concern such as calling a friend, not for support, but to give support, and volunteering in the community will help to put you in touch with something beyond the challenges that you are facing in your own life.
Compassion will help you to find your way back to your true self.
What is your vision for the future? An arthritis diagnosis will mean change and a degree of uncertainty.
Neither you nor your doctor can predict what the future hold for you.
But you can keep a positive attitude about your future, and this doesn't mean pretending that you don't have arthritis or that it's going to have minimal impact on your life.
You must understand that the future may look very different to you now but you can choose hope over despair by accepting the possibilities of the future.
There are a few things you can do to start on your vision for the future; 1.
Talk to yourself about what you want out of life in the future.
Write down your goals that have been important to you.
Look at what kind of compromises you are willing to make and those you will not, don't even allow yourself to remain uncertain about what you don't know.
2.
Talk to your doctors and learn what it will take for you to stay as healthy as possible.
You may want to include a physical therapist and a dietitian on your health care team as this will give you the whole picture.
3.
Get to know others that have been diagnosed with arthritis and learn how they are coping with their condition.
4.
Talk to your friends and family continuing any conversations that you had started at an earlier time.
Remember that your diagnosis doesn't define who you are, and it does not define your relationships with those you love.
5.
Talk to your Higher Power, who or whatever that may be.
I pray to God every day to keep my pain and fatigue at a minimum so that I may do his works.
I don't stop there though, I continue to talk to God throughout the day and this has helped me so much.
It's like this huge load has been lifted from my shoulders and I'm finally able to do whatever it is I have to do that day.
Before creating your vision you have to give yourself permission to have a future.