Have you recently stopped the rush and considered this? Are you coming from loneliness and therefore seeking companionship? Are you coming from anger and therefore determined to "make it" in the world? Are you coming from smallness, feeling rejected and therefore always trying to prove yourself? As a leader, and a lover, it is wise to know where you are coming from in relationships with people.
As you know already from working with me you can't manage relationship if you can't manage yourself.
You can't know someone else if you don't know yourself.
Otherwise you will just be projecting onto people and won't know anything.
It doesn't matter whether it is your relationships, or your work, you come from the same place in all of them.
That is a vital awareness.
Some people come from kindness, some from authority, some from mothering, some from fathering.
Where we come from in relationship with people seems to fluctuate but that is not true.
Sometimes the person we are interacting with accentuates where we are coming from.
For example, when we are in a relationship with someone we really want to like us, then we can be very deceptive because we are trying not to offend that person.
So this relationship accentuated our shame.
That person was coming from shame the whole time but until they met someone they really wanted to be with, or admired, they weren't aware of that shame.
Nasty people, people who are moody and attacking, they are coming from a place of feeling small, irrelevant.
They might be taller than the average person but they really feel small and so they fear being made redundant.
This is behind so much attention seeking.
Feeling small.
Kind people, people who might be tough on the surface but generous at heart are coming from feeling rejected, they want acceptance.
This is a wonderful twist of fate in that a disaster in one experience can produce a giving individual in the world.
Once you know where you are coming from, then you can simply know where others are coming from.
And when you know where a person is coming from, their reactionsto you and the stresses of their life can be totally understood.
Remember, peoples behavior is totally predictable, and when you can understand the way people act and react, it is easier to work with them, and certainly easier to live with them.
There is order in the chaos.
The universe is predictable, nature is predictable, your life is predictable and your relationships are predictable.
It is a very beautiful awareness to see how everything in the universe operates according to very simple laws.
Our ego tries to defy those laws, that is called emotion, but we can't, that is called pain.
To understand something is to see beauty in it.
The materialist will look at the world and see acceptable and unacceptable.
They will divide life into these two groups, attracted to one, and avoiding (or trying to change) the other.
That is the materialist life, more acceptable, less unacceptable.
This is a materially powerful way to think because it accumulates things and wealth.
Sadly there is one thing lacking in that materialist life, and that is true happiness.
Happiness comes from the spiritual perspective.
In the spiritual perspective there is order in the chaos.
That order, turns the unacceptable in to beauty, and the acceptable into beauty.
Then there is simply love.
Love not dependent on something happening, love is there.
Happiness comes from peace of mind.
Peace of mind comes from an inner smile, a stillness, stillness comes from contentment and contentment comes when we do not want to change anything.
When all is perfect as it is, then there is contentment, stillness, an inner smile, peace of mind and all this leads to happiness.
Happiness for the materialist is defined as pleasure.
Something makes us happy.
But happiness to the spiritual person is not pleasure.
Happiness is where the spiritual person comes from.
They come from happiness, because they see beauty, they feel content, they do not want to change anything and therefore have peace of mind.
Love can only flow from a mind that is at peace with itself.
That does not mean the mind has stopped thinking, no, it has simply come to rest, it is working intensely, focused, but is not stressed, worried.
So, it is absolutely possible to be both a materialist, and a spiritual person at once.
The material perspective is the external and the spiritual perspective is the internal one.
Spiritual means where you come from.
It does not affect where others come from, only your ability to see order in the chaos, and therefore understand their perspectives, and more importantly see where they come from.
Spiritual perspective is achievable while leading the largest or smallest team in business, but most importantly, it is where your heart must sit in a sacred loving relationship.